Skin To Skin/Bonding Time

At my request, the nurses had previously set up some curtains to give Alice privacy while she was pushing, and Gordon & I privacy so we could do skin-to-skin with the baby.

Gordon was able to be present during most of the labor. During birth, while Alice was pushing, he was behind the curtains to give her privacy. He wasn’t able to be in the room when I had Destynee, so he never had a chance to see labor or experience the birth of a baby.
Alice allowed him to experience it thru his ears and emotions. He was overwhelmed with the whole experience. There was a very intense, beautiful feeling in the room, and he could feel it.

Here I came, holding our baby boy! He was perfect! A normal, healthy baby!!! Daddy and mommy were able to do skin-to-skin, and the staff left us alone with him for the most part. He was having a little struggle coughing and throwing-up some fluid that he had swallowed. After he got most of it up, I was able to nurse him. He latched right on!!! I couldn’t believe a brand-new baby already knew how to nurse. I felt so much joy!!! I got to have a very different experience with him, then I had had with Destynee.

A healthy, full-term, beautiful, baby boy!!! Thank you Alice, Thank you!!!

Overload of Emotions!

As my beautiful baby boy entered the world, I had a complete visual of a baby elephant. What??? He was enormous, 9.9lbs!!! His head came out, and then each limb came out, one at a time. Arm, arm…Leg, leg…. It was like he was too big to come out all at once. It was awesome!!! What a thrill!!
But poor baby mamma, ouch!!!

All at once, the tears I had been holding back for 30 hours, came pouring out. I felt euphoric and stunned all at the same time. I didn’t feel completely in my body. I was in shock!

I cut the cord, and they put him on baby mamma’s belly to clean him off. I had to get to Alice….. I wrapped my arms around her and we both cried our eyes out…. I was pretty hysterical!!! Emotional overload!!!!

The doctor immediately gave me my baby, and the nurse guided me to the chair. Waiting for me behind the curtains, was daddy, anxiously waiting to see his new baby boy!

Miracle Number Two!

After 30 hours of long, hard labor, my second miracle arrived! It’s a boy!!! Gordon Metallic, miracle number two!!!

After 28 hours, we were all exhausted, but nobody could complain. We knew that our exhaustion couldn’t touch the exhaustion, Alice, our wonderful baby mamma, felt….. And now it was time to push! She had given it all she had, and now had to give some more… WOW! She is so strong, and did such an amazing job.

It was torcher for me to watch her go thru all of it. I so badly wanted to take all the pain from her, and wished that I could trade her places. She was going thru all this for me, and I did not want her to have a bad experience. I tried to hold back the tears, and the guilt I felt for putting her thru this. Yet, I knew in my heart that she chose this experience, and I had to be okay with it.
There was nothing I could do to change it at this point; all I could do was help her thru it. Alice had her wonderful husband, our sister as a coach, our hypnobirthing instructor, my husband, and myself during her labor for support. We made an excellent team, but Alice made it all possible.

It was truly a beautiful experience, and I feel honored that she allowed me to be at the birth. I got to be a part of the birth of my second miracle, Gordon Metallic.

The Waiting Game/Holiday Break???

I started back on medications to calm and quiet my ovaries AGAIN, and Alice and I both started back on birth control AGAIN…… Stupid birth control! I felt like it was controlling my life….I wasn’t myself when I was on it.

The doctors had mentioned that they had one more drug they could add to the mix right at the end of the next cycle. It was supposed to super-boost everything, but could be dangerous. They stressed that this would be the last cycle that they would recommend. If it didn’t work next time, they didn’t have any other ideas……

As Alice and I waited again for our bodies to regulate so we could start another cycle process, I tried very hard to forget about all of it for a minute… I wanted to just BE with my family through the holidays and enjoy what I DID have….I had completely exhausted myself, and needed a serious break…………

Right at the beginning of the surrogate process, I had committed be present with my daughter and to stay conscious about not pushing Destynee aside while we were trying to get pregnant. I felt like I was staying pretty focused on her during the preliminary work and during the first cycle, but I realized that through all the stress of the second cycle, I wasn’t as present as I wanted to be with her.

In the back of my mind, I was scared about what the final outcome would be, but for the most part, I was able to reconnect with my adorable daughter, Destynee, and my amazingly, supportive husband, Gordon.

I managed, at times, to find peace about what was going on. This time I embraced the month and a half break for my ovaries. I continued to support them, and through inspiration, gave them what I thought they needed to be strong.

Alice and her family spent Christmas with us. We had a great time and were able to talk a lot about what we were both going through.