Overload of Emotions!

As my beautiful baby boy entered the world, I had a complete visual of a baby elephant. What??? He was enormous, 9.9lbs!!! His head came out, and then each limb came out, one at a time. Arm, arm…Leg, leg…. It was like he was too big to come out all at once. It was awesome!!! What a thrill!!
But poor baby mamma, ouch!!!

All at once, the tears I had been holding back for 30 hours, came pouring out. I felt euphoric and stunned all at the same time. I didn’t feel completely in my body. I was in shock!

I cut the cord, and they put him on baby mamma’s belly to clean him off. I had to get to Alice….. I wrapped my arms around her and we both cried our eyes out…. I was pretty hysterical!!! Emotional overload!!!!

The doctor immediately gave me my baby, and the nurse guided me to the chair. Waiting for me behind the curtains, was daddy, anxiously waiting to see his new baby boy!

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Last Cycle/Last Chance:(

So as I mentioned before, the doctors said this would be our last cycle, our last chance! They may have let us keep trying, but made it clear that in their opinion, the results would be very similar. They weren’t sure that the added medication would make much of a difference, but we were ALL willing to try just about anything. I felt like I was under alot of pressure.

The doctors all got together and agreed on one professional opinion. They encouraged us to continue with the egg retrieval and transfer, regardless of if I could produce enough eggs. (Enough meaning 8-12 mature eggs.) They had hopes that the new, added medication would help a little, and figured this would be our best shot.

We obviously wanted to see what the results were before we sealed the deal, but we had mostly made up our minds that this was IT!!! Gordon and I once again, put our complete trust and faith in God.

The decision felt so scary, like we had come to the end of our rope, like the clock would stopped ticking………….And yet, at the same time, I felt a sigh of relief…Like it was almost over…We could get on with our lives…….

Floods of thoughts and emotions swept over me….I wasn’t sure which thought or feeling was the strongest or which ones I should feel guilty about. It changed every second, as I was completely overwhelmed, and yet at times, peaceful about where we were at.