And MORE Weaving Between Stipulations….

Alice and I were also supposed to start our medications according to her cycle, but we didn’t know if everything would clear in time. I was very anxious to begin the actual process. I felt like I was in a never-ending battle, and wondered if we would ever start the invitro-surrogacy process.

The egg retrieval process, if we could even get that far, is typically a simple procedure that can be done right in the office. Because of my heart, I would have to be in the hospital operating room completely put out with several staff members (cardiac anesthesiologist, surgeon, nurses, and someone to control my pacemaker). The bill that came with that was outrageous, about $5,000!!! My insurance wouldn’t cover a penny of it because it was infertility related, and we had to have the money up front.

Financially, we were starting to question whether we could really pull it off. At the beginning, we had plan what resources we could pull the money from, but all the additional fees that we weren’t expecting, were adding up very fast. The legal fees alone were $5,000. Everytime we had to do lab work and screenings, they would add about $500 per person, and we all had to do them about every two weeks at first. The psychological consult was $1,000. The medication to just get started was about $3,000.

All this never even guaranteed a baby or a pregnancy, and it was only a ONE shot deal. We had one chance to get it right. It became such a gigantic project. It felt like a business deal, and I felt like I was losing. Most of the time I forgot what it was that I was even working towards, that the goal had anything to do with having a baby. I was very caught up in the regimen. It felt so mechanical…..It felt so wrong:(


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