25 Weeks/We Made It!!!

I am 25 weeks along. We made it!!!
Six weeks can be very gruelling. Not knowing what’s going to happen, and feeling like things were so up in the air and changing every second, was driving me insane. I was very anxious for the next step.

I was admitted into the hospital the morning starting 25 weeks, to stay for the remainder of the pregnancy. I felt like I was going to Disneyland or somewhere really important. I felt so much excitement, like I had just climbed the biggest mountian!!!!

At the same time, a gut renching fear that if I had this baby this early, what would be the quality of my child’s life? Would it be worth it? Was I just being selfish in wanting a baby so bad? Thinking about having a baby at 25 weeks, and the long-term effects that the baby may have to endure it’s whole life, was more than I could bare. I didn’t know what I had gotten us into, and almost wished that we had lost it earlier.

As I tried to vizualize the normal, healthy, perfect baby, I was flooded with what ifs. I tried to keep any negative thoughts to myself, keeping in the back of my mind that we had made it this far for a reason.

I had previously worked on a different floor of the hospital I was admitted to, so the staff treated me exceptionally well and put me up in their biggest room they called “the princess room”.

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